03 Mar Help The Cell Group
The main cell group we are involved in is “dying” (in my view). As I have too many commitments, I had taken a follower role in this group though I don’t join the meetings as much due to competing commitments.
The group dynamics has evolved to be quite complicated but I’ll summarize it as a cell group with very little life and spiritual growth. My wife and I have generally been balancing being “over-active” and in that process becoming the pseudo leader but being sufficiently engaged and supportive to ensure the group doesn’t totally die. Have asked God a couple times if I need to do anything more to help keep the group going, my sense is no need (phew haha).
This night, God told my wife to help the group.
My first thoughts were: urgh.. God, so tiring. So many things on our plate and this group actually has a leader who is quite “free” from what we can see. We are so tired from this wilderness journey you put us on yet you still want us to help this group actively.
My verbal reactions: “ok so tiring but since God asked, we will do it”
I don’t remember the details that God told my wife but basically I remember she told me that God wants us to fellowship physically with the leaders. I had really wanted to catch-up on my own ministry and non-profit work on Sat but since God was so clear I said ok to spending some time with the leaders of this group.
7 Mar 2022
I originally thought I’ll give it a few hours. Little did I expect to spend the WHOLE day in their house.
It was just normal chatting and playing with kids the whole time. We did some worship, about 5-7 songs. In my view we did not do much. No deep discussions and no prayers. Again I didn’t initiate anything much as I sensed its not what God wanted. I did share more about our current season and journey.
Although we didn’t talk deeply about the issues of the cell group with the leaders, my wife and I observed that many of our assumptions about the core problems of the group were sort of correct. So in a way we understood why God asked us to help in certain ways.
That evening the leader sent us a message and I immediately saw God is working. In my mind we spent a lot of time but we didn’t do anything much (as God led) and yet God is working just because we obeyed and we went over to fellowship physically as God asked.
Once again, all God wants is our obedience. He works, not us. I’m joyful to see God work in my brother, slowly but surely.
The same evening, another couple from this group shared about how God has led them to share about God to their private chef this same day. I’m overjoyed to hear this. It always bring great joy to me to see people grow in the faith. 🙂
At the same time, wife and I concluded that seems we need to reach out to each couple and minister to their needs one couple at a time. This was basically what God told my wife. After fellowship with the leaders, we were like.. seems we need to do it ourselves… once again I was like.. this is tiring, God.. but ok..
14 Mar 2022
One of the couple with a more urgent issue had been on our minds and I was still a little concerned, tired and little “stressed” that I need to take some time to catch up and minister to the husband. This day it came to my attention that the husband had reached out, agreed to meet the leaders. In fact through their conversations the husband is not as open to meet wife and me. So I told wife that this is good. Let the leaders shepherd their flocks. Thank God for freeing up my time and attention too. Our posture is: we are always here to support alongside in intercessory prayers and also physically whenever the leaders need us.
13 May 2022
Leaders and wife gave me a surprise birthday lunch treat.
Over lunch leader brought up that an elder had suggested the group join the new Connect group that is coming up after the latest Alpha course.
I kept quiet at first and asked God what this is all about and what does He want me to say. I shared some context of common small group issues that I’m aware of during my conversations and meetings with church leadership and pastors. I was trying to lay the context and foundation for a more robust discussion and sharing. Halfway through leader had to leave for a work meeting. We continued with the leader’s wife.
Spirit led us to be super open to leader’s wife and I share almost everything on my heart regarding the small group, some issues that God placed on our hearts, how we feel as members, how Christian leadership should be, how a shepherding heart looks like etc. I mentioned a few times to the leader’s wife to pray and discern about what we talked about and not to take any action before God leads.
By night, not too surprising to me and wife, my dear sister had “verbal diarrhea” and shared everything to the leader without much prayer and discernment though she muttered a quick prayer for God to help her. That night we are aware that the leader is clearly upset and might even be stumbled. So the leader’s wife said the baton is passed back to me to sort things out. A few of them are coming to my house for fellowship the next day.
I inquired the Lord and He said things are ok. I asked God if my sharing with the leader’s wife was gentle or discerning enough. God whispered its ok. I sense that sometimes God needs to stir things up a bit to surface the impurities.
I went to bed expecting that the responsibility falls on me to talk and share biblical principles to sort things out, perhaps on leadership or shepherding topics.
When I woke up I prayed that God take control about this situation.
In the afternoon, when they all came over to our house, we chit chat casually. I then led the group to worship. I chose 3 chinese songs especially for a chinese couple whom I was trying to do light ministering to.
When another couple needed to leave first, my wife and I prayed for them and their newborn.
The rest of us went swimming with the kids.
Just before we all left, I led the team to pray together.
During prayers, I saw a golden ring holding the waist of a couple and their son together. We are aware that this couple had some issues with their marriage. I thank God for holding their marriage covenant together.
The couple prayed too. The Spirit in me was joyful to hear them pray and the presence of God is strong.
God had worked in a way that doesn’t require me to sit down and talked things over which is a little more tiring for me. Yet God is working in the midst beautifully and things are turning for the better for this group.. The leader is now praying for the group more too.
8 Aug 2022
Group in entering a next phase we we change leadership, I do think it’s a good outcome for all, overall